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Author Archives: Ryan
The Other “Impressive” Students
Mary Landeau is fucking awkward at every party and she’s already been cunt punted two times and is close to a third. She’s a sometimes member of the PanHellenic council on campus and sister of some sorority. At parties, she … Continue reading
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Rumpus’ Society Guide
It’s society season! Some juniors woke up today to society letters sealed with wax. If you got one without wax, that society sucks. The letters often contain cryptic acronyms so Rumpus is here to help decipher all of their secrets: … Continue reading
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Home from Harvard for the Holidays: Telling Your Friends You’re A Dickhead
If you’re a student at Harvard, be sure to attend this real event on campus this Wednesday. If your friends at home didn’t think you were arrogant douches already, just wait. Home from Harvard for the Holidays: Revisiting Relationships with … Continue reading
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ECON Bottero ’15 Quits Major
When Intermediate Microeconomics holds class Monday morning, Economics major Sean Bottero ’15 will not be on board. Bottero announced his departure from the major in an email to the entire Econ department on Tuesday, the Rumpus has learned. His decision … Continue reading
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Freshman Recipe for Disaster- How to Screw Yourself and No One Else
Rumpus is uniquely qualified to tell you about all the things that can screw up your upcoming school year, because- let’s be honest- we’ve done all of them. We ended our freshman year broke, broken up with, and broken out. … Continue reading
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